Counting down. 

My son, Devon, is getting married in two days. He is marrying a wonderful woman, Kristine McAllister. They met a decade ago, as freshmen in college, remained in touch throughout the years, and now … they’re ready for the big day.

          I thought it would be strange to have a child get married. I thought I would have conflicted feelings about my son growing up, complete with misty visions of the smiling baby with honey-sweet skin and a velvet-soft head who I’d held in my arms, the infant who’d put me through mothering school.  

I thought I’d fret about that adage about “A son’s a son until he takes a wife; a daughter’s a daughter all of her life.” I’ve always hated that saying, by the way, and recoiled at the sexism inherent in it. Still do.

I also worried about getting a daughter-in-law. I watched some of my friends struggle with theirs, and I worried.

          Now that the time is here, none of these things is coming true. Devon’s marriage feels absolutely right. He is ready. He is mature. He’s found the love of his life. And, one thing is certain: it’s far worse to have a child who doesn’t grow up than one who does. No conflict here. I’m thrilled.

          I also am thrilled about getting a daughter-in-law. Kristine is a delight. She is fun and has a wicked sense of humor. I knew she’d fit well into our family once when we were discussing a murderer who had walked into a church service and shot the bishop. Straightfaced, she said, “Couldn’t he have waited until after the service?”

Kristine is confident and is absolutely her own person. I asked her one time if she’d ever gone on a diet. (Disclaimer: she’s willowy and thin and does not need to diet. It was just a passing question.) Her reply: “I tried it once and I didn’t like it, so I’ve never done it again.” A young woman secure enough not to diet? That is someone who’s comfortable in her own skin.

So, casting these insecurities aside, I’ve been able to focus on the important details of the wedding. Finding a dress that doesn’t drown me in matronly chiffon. Choosing the right desserts for the wedding luncheon (chocolate? lemon? Yes!). Making travel plans (fly or drive?).   

And now we’re ready to go. We are ready for a trip from Colorado to Utah. Devon and Kristine are getting ready for the journey of a lifetime.